TANTRUMS {part three}
Firstly, I definitely don't have all the answers but hope that this has been helpful to some of you.
Secondly, you might have read my posts and wondered if your toddler’s tantrums are in excess because they feel so overwhelming. So let me say this: in most cases, tantrums are a normal and common feature in toddler development; it is not your fault; you are doing a great job. This too shall pass.
But in some cases, you might need to reach out. If your toddler is having tantrums that are difficult to resolve (e.g. longer than 15 mins at a time); occurring very frequently (a few times a day); and occurring consistently (for months on end), then it might be time to reach out.
Some specific red flags to look out for -
Is your toddler regularly hurting himself or others when having a tantrum?
Is there a specific trigger that always sets her off? (e.g. meal refusal tantrums)
Are the tantrums in excess of 5 a day for a week? This ballpark figure isn’t scientific per se, but just a guideline.
Do the tantrums seem excessively long and is your child very difficult to bring back to calm?
Do the tantrums resemble meltdowns more often than not?
Are there other associated concerns that you have? (e.g. delayed milestones)
Do you feel like you are angry and needing support?
Consistency and frequency is important here, because some weeks are just really rough and then the next week things get better. Parenthood ebbs and flows and so, before you worry, try to evaluate where you are at. If you are concerned about your toddler, and if you are not coping as a parent, reach out. Give your nearest psychologist or doctor a call; or pop me an email at nkhprac@gmail.com to connect and I will direct you to your nearest professional.
Thanks for joining me on this series. Let me know if there is something specific you'd like to read next.
Keep soldiering on moms and dads.
NOTE: This blog post is not intended to diagnose or provide professional help. Please contact me or your nearest health care provider for assistance if needed. This article is a collection of thoughts, intended to support moms and dads in their parenting journey. It is not a complete reflection of the body of information out there on tantrums, but only a subjective portion thereof.
Sources:
Fetsch, R.J. & Jacobson, B. (date unkown). Children’s anger and tantrums. Retrieved January 2019 from
https://extension.colostate.edu/docs/pubs/consumer/10248.pdf
Morin, A. (date unknown). The difference between tantrums and sensory overload. Retrieved February 2019 from https://www.understood.org/en/learning-attention-issues/child-learning-disabilities/sensory-processing-issues/the-difference-between-tantrums-and-sensory-meltdowns
Tantrums: why they happen and how to respond. Retrieved January 2019 from
https://raisingchildren.net.au/toddlers/behaviour/crying-tantrums/tantrums
Chang, L. (2007). Tantrum Red Flags. Retrieved February 2019 from
https://www.webmd.com/parenting/news/20071219/5-tantrum-red-flags#2